Observations

I'm a month behind on reading O (Oprah) Magazine. Okay, I'm about a month behind on everything. But back to my point.....

I was reading all these articles about breast cancer - awareness, survivors, scares, ect. - and I noticed that pretty much all the married women retained their maiden names. I find that odd. I mean, you see this now and then and I suppose more often with professional women, but....what gives? I went from a very average, no one misspells it name to my husband's everyone misspells it and even pronounces it wrong name. And I'm glad I did. I liked making that commitment in a public, permanent way. I admire Courtney Cox Arquette who added her husband's last name to hers when she married - even though she was established and famous. I guess I get this even less than couples who live together for 20 years and never get married. What's the big deal?

So, is it this: "Oh, just in case we don't manage to make it work, there will be a LOT less paperwork on my side," or "No one would know who I am if I changed my name (because I'm so popular, of course)," or maybe "I don't want to be associated with his family". Okay, well the last one might be stretching it. But if you don't take his name because it would be a lot of work "when" the divorce happens, why did you marry? And if you're that popular, don't you think people will still know it's you? No one was confused about Courtney. And don't get me started on how you figure out a child's last name in these circumstances.

To each his own, of course, and I'd never want to impose my ideas on someone or make it a rule or a law, but it just screams, "I'm not committed to this relationship" to me. And in a world where so much divorce occurs, maybe taking that one extra step might help make the commitment seem more vital or real. Well, maybe not, too. I guess it depends on how things go.