Miss Them?

I've made sure that I'm working my 3 days a week even if school is out so far - okay, I've only been working about 3 weeks, but still. I'm used to being a woman of leisure who writes on her book all day while mold developes around the kitchen sink and the dog sneaks up on the couch for the fifth time that day. I really LOVED working when I was single. I was a workaholic and I could bask in the glory of my achievements and exceptional work ethic. I'm not kidding. I was amazing (and just take this in because I don't tend to have the self-esteem to brag about myself very often). Now I'm getting really good, positive feedback at my new job. Stuff like, "We love that you're catching on so quickly and you do such a great job. You're really thorough. You've really helped us start catching up." ECT. It makes me feel great because I'm getting that feedback without working myself to death like I did when I had no family to clean up after, cook meals for and do their mounds of never ending laundry - something Rachel likes to collect in her bathroom and bedroom, all of it on the floor. So when we had this four day weekend come up, I decided instead to take it. I'm so glad I did because I over scheduled myself for the first couple of days and I really, really want to carve out more time to work on my book (and blog, apparently). Technically, I don't need to be back at work until Wednesday. But I may go in Tuesday anyway. We'll see how much I get done over the next 3 days.

My mom fell and broke her hip. This fall happened about six days ago. They took her in for x-rays and saw nothing. She came home. The pain progressed, so my sister (whom my parents live with) took her back again. They put her on some pain meds - the kind that make my normally relatively nice mother a very, very cranky, nasty, screaming person. It was not fun. But still, the pain progressed. They redid the x-rays, much more thorough this time, and found the hip fractured clean through. They hadn't seen it before because depending on her position, it didn't separate so it would show up. Saturday morning she is scheduled to have surgery. It's only a 30 minute one and the real work is in recovery, but I feel like things will be okay.

Yesterday, Thursday, Rachel went for the first time to do baptisms for the dead. For those non-members that read, we believe that when people pass and have not had the opportunity to hear the gospel on this earth or are unable to accept it, we can perform these ordinances for them and they can make an informed decision in the afterlife, or spirit world. Our youth, once they are twelve years old, have the opportunity to do this for those people and this is the basis of our genealogy work. Yesterday, Rachel did a number of baptisms and also for some family members - My grandmothers on both my parent's sides, my great grandmother and great, great grandmother on my mother's side. One of the young men we are very fond of did my grandfather's on both sides and my great grandfather on my mother's side. In the process of getting this information together so Rachel could do this work, I found there is another relative who is also a member of the church in California who has done work for ancestors beyond these names on my mother's side. It's very exciting and I plan to contact him and see where his branch comes into my family. Anyway, the entire experience was very spiritual, emotional and beautiful for both Rachel and I as I got to be there and witness it.

Okay, that's about as caught up as I can get for now. I still the bulk of my house to clean - Waaaaaa.

LOVE THEM

Man, I want this CD. When Jay is working and we are on our feet, I'm buying it. I love Alisonn Krauss and I've always loved Led Zeppelin (Robert Plant was the lead singer, in case you didn't know).

Robert Plant and Alison Krauss: Raising Sand is the name of the album.

I Got Tagged

My friend Audra decided to tag me on this little info game. It's called Six 8 Things. Here goes:

8 Things I Did Yesterday:

1. Took Rachel to school.
2. Worked.
3. Saw Samatha in the halls at school.
4. Picked Rachel up from school.
5. Made dinner.
6. Picked up the house a little.
7. Watched some TV - Chuck, Heroes and Medium (see? Too much TV)
8. Went to bed.

8 Movies I Love to Watch:

1. The Quiet Man
2. Brigadoon
3. The Princess Bride
4. The Lord of the Rings series (I think that counts as 3, right?)
7. Harry Potter series - (that gets 'er done)

8 Things on My Wish List:

1. A leather recliner sofa
2. A matching leather recliner/rocker
3. A china cabinet
4. My book published
5. Our debt cleared away
6. Our family to be always happy
7. Our dog to stop shedding
8. A clothing shopping spree

8 Things I Look Forward to:

1. My book being published
2. Jay getting a job, preferrably a good paying one
3. Having more time to read
4. Retiring so I can have more time to read
5. Watching my beautiful daughter grow and change and form into the wonderful young woman I know she will be
6. Grandkids when the time is right
7. Seeing the paycheck reward for my working
8. Starting a second book when I finish my first one

8 Favorite Restaurants:

1. Johnny Carinos (Italian - yummy!!!)
2. Outback
3. Souper Salad
4. Taco Bell - does that count?
5. Magiano's - I'm sure I spelled that wrong
6. Applebees - once in a blue moon
7. Formosa Garden
8. Geez, I'm going with my own kitchen....

8 People to Tag:

No, I just don't want to do that. So.....myself 8 times. Oh, look! I'm done. hahahaha

Stolen Idea

I saw this idea on a blog I regularly read and thought it would be very therapeutic and fun for me. So here are 25 tidbits about me: 

1. I LOVE writing (like people who know me don't know that *roll eyes*). 

2. I often feel like I've failed as a wife and mother, even though I know I work hard at it and I appear to be pretty successful for the most part. 

3. I wish I could just accept who and what my husband is and not ever, ever whine about him. It's why I try to crack jokes about stuff concerning him instead. It feels...wrong to complain about him. 

4. I wish I were thin and that it was easier to make that happen then it is. 

5. I love to read, but find little time for it. 

6. I think I watch TOO MUCH TV. I wish I didn't enjoy the shows I do as much as I do and could just miss them without feeling like I'd regret it. Of course, it's just TV and so that's rather stupid, but I suppose the shows I do watch are somewhat of an obsession. 

7. I wish I'd gone to college - even if just for 1 year, so that I felt better educated. I think I'm pretty smart. I've learned a lot just living life and most people are surprised when I say I didn't go to college. Despite that, I wish I had. I think I missed out on an experience by not going. 

8. I'm grateful for having had to start working at a young age - 14. It helped develop a really strong work ethic in me and even in just this short week at my new job, my co-workers have commented on how quickly I learn and how hard I work. It makes me proud. 

9. My faith has become one of the most important things in my life. Every moment of my life I am grateful for the gospel and the peace and happiness and strength it gives me. I wish I could share it with everyone - which brings me to #10. 

10. I'm a terrible missionary. I don't know. I guess I just feel like religion is such a personal thing that it's hard to "talk up" my own faith. I share it with friends, just not in a missionary way and I call it good.  

11. I don't think Rachel would be the wonderful, spiritual child she is were it not for her Primary and Young Women teachers/leaders. I couldn't have gotten it right on my own. 

12. I love my husband's hairy chest. I know, it's TMI, but it's something I find very sexy about him. And his hands. I love his hands. 

13. Sometimes I wish I could go away for a few days, all by myself, and just write or daydream or sing without interruption and without fear or regret that I'm not doing what I should be doing.

14. I used to love my singing voice but it's not as nice as it used to be since I was diagnosed with asthma. This makes me sad and makes me wish I'd made a recording of all the songs I sang to Rachel at bedtime when she was little so she would have them to listen to when she feels too grown up to ask me to sing her to sleep now (though once in a while, she still does ask). 

15. I love that our cat, Lacey, is sort of my cat. She sits in my arms in the evenings and follows me around meowing at me or watching for me to sit down when I'm busy doing things around the house. It makes me feel special. 

16. I wish I knew how to reach into my daughter's heart and take away any hurt she's had this first year in middle school. Middle school sucks. I remember. 

17. I don't think my mother enjoys talking to me on the phone anymore. For about the last 6 or 7 months, every time I call, she tells me within a couple of minutes that I've called at a bad time and she has to do this or that. It hurts my feelings, even though I'm in my 40's, and so I hardly call her anymore. I figure, what's the point. I also try to be sure I'm only calling with good, positive news, thinking maybe I've had times I'm whining about something and she doesn't want to hear it. I don't know. It keeps me feeling the way I did growing up as a kid - the black sheep. It sucks. I should be adult enough to get past that. 

18. I'm extremely embarrassed about our financial situation and wish I could just miraculously make it go away. I feel like we've sinned by not following the admonitions of our church to avoid debt. Even the student loans for Jay's schooling have come back to bite us in the butt. 

19. I miss the beautiful home I had when I was single - nice furniture, beautiful country/Victorian decoration, beautiful colors and in good condition because I took really good care of the places I lived in. Our current house is also an embarrassment to me. It's partially why we don't invite people over anymore. 

20. I remember childhood vacations to lots of destinations - the coast of Maine, Sequoia National Park in California (we lived in San Francisco in the Presidio when I was little - My youngest sister was born there), Minnesota where my aunt owned a cabin on a lake, Indiana where my parents were born and raised, the Dakotas, Maryland and Virginia (my dad worked at the Pentagon when he was in the Army and we also lived in both places), Washington DC. I still remember looking up at the Lincoln Memorial and thinking he was watching me as I moved. Lots of other places. My parent's goal was to get all of their kids into every state, even if we just drove through it, before we were all grown. 

21. I still remember walking in Yellowstone National Park down a wooden walkway with my dad when I was a little girl. 

22. We camped in a huge tent my parents bought while in Germany for almost all our vacations. My mom bathed us every night, too. There were 5 of us kids. She had two large, round, plastic basins - one to wash, one to rinse - and she bathed us like an assembly line. The 3 girls first, then both my brothers. My dad got up every morning early and made breakfast for the family when we camped so mom could sleep a little longer. 

23. I hate to camp now. It's partially because of my back problems and partially because of bugs. Sometimes I feel like I've cheated Rachel out of a fun experience, so I'm hoping Girl Scouts made up for that.... 

24. I fantasize I'll make $250,000 (after taxes) off my book (very unlikely, but......). It would clear off our credit card, student loans, and mortgage after tithing so we could live with sooooo much less stress. We'd be able to get a second used car and give back to the church for some of the help they have given us. And pay my book editor a healthy chunk for her hard and honest work. 

25. I need to clean my house more often and keep it picked up better during the week until the next cleaning.