Sooooo.....

Okay, I'm lame and couldn't come up with a title today. I'm tired - sleepy - as we adjust to my favorite time for church, mornings. It really is my favorite because I love to take a little nap after (which I have yet to do) and to have the rest of the day to relax and enjoy the Sabbath.

Since I haven't posted since the day after Christmas, I thought I ought to catch up. Not that life has been all that exciting. But changes have happened, hopes have been raised and my baby has had some sadness.

Starting with Rachel, her boyfriend broke up with her. She seemed to take it just fine, really not upset and just wanting to stay friends with him since, at this young age, that's basically all they were (there wasn't even any hand-holding). But as the week wore on, she started to be a little sad about it and ended up having a good cry. We invited her best friend to come over on Saturday. She'd asked the boyfriend because he said he still wanted to be friends but had something going on and her other friend started selling Girl Scout cookies yesterday. But what she really wanted was her best friend. She's moved far enough away that it's not always easy for them to get together, but her mom helped me work it out and Rachel went to her house instead. Under the circumstances, with no jobs around here yet and stress continuing to be a bit high, I think it was a nice break for her from what can't help but be an underlying stress for her, too. She had also had some catty things said to her at school by a couple of girls. Ah, middle school is so.....lovely. Everyone at their very best, eh? *rolling my eyes* But Saturday was like a balm to her wounds and she came home much happier.

We then joined friends to celebrate a husband's retirement and Rachel got to play with all the kids that she's come to love babysitting and see her all-time favorite babysitter and her little boy. She enjoyed herself - as did we - and we came home exhausted and happy.

Jay has started working out!!!! Okay, it's just one week so far, but I'm really proud of him and he jumped right in to doing Tae Bo Basic. He managed it 3 times this week and then an afternoon of disc golf (Frisbee golf) which he's played for more years than I've known him. He's already showing physical improvements and his blood sugars have dropped almost to normal.

I've lamely walked 3 times this past week but now feel challenged to get it together and start my 2 mile brisk walks with Walk Away the Pounds. After a couple of weeks of that, I'll move to Jane Fonda's Low Impact video, which I've done for years. When that starts to get easy, I move on to Tae Bo Basic. I can't jump right in to Tae Bo like Jay can. I'm too out of shape and too fat and my back just won't take it. I always have to start easy and work my way up. Boy, I miss Curves, though.

Jay's had several interviews and we're waiting to hear from the latest one. I've not had any responses to my applications which feels really weird to me. I've always jumped right into jobs - all but one with just a single interview - and I'm not used to not being a first pick. It sort of sucks. But I am looking for part-time only and maybe that has something to do with it. I am working A LOT on my book again, though. And, oh it is coming together. I can hardly wait to finish it.

I got another calling at church and I'm really happy with it, too. I already am a visiting teaching supervisor which doesn't require much - just calling every month to see if everyone on my list got their visits in and to make sure I get mine done with my companion. Now I'll be the building scheduler for our ward and the other ward that shares our building. I have strong organizational skills, so this will be a nice calling for me. Though I must admit, when I was set apart today, I prayed that I would be able to do the job well. I'm thinking my self esteem has taken a hit with the job hunting and our circumstances.

I've grown leaps and bounds spiritually over all of this, though. I remember again how important it is that we read our scriptures as a family every day (we're reading the Book of Mormon) and that I read mine at night, too (Doctrine and Covenants). I remember again how important family and individual prayer is and I've listened to my daughter improve in her prayers spiritually. I've had my faith and testimony built back up about tithing and trying to be the best we can, despite our struggles. Jay and I have moved closer to each other, another step toward the marriage I've always prayed for. I'm not a fool, though. I know there are still struggles ahead but having those challenges less frequently is so much nicer than when it was all the time.

We've been volunteering a lot, too, try to show our appreciation for all our church has done for us during this awful unemployment situation. We've done humanitarian canning, which I really enjoyed (though it gave my feet a run for their money). Jay has been going every Saturday to help clean the church and we'll be taking turns going out to the cannery/Bishop's storehouse with the ward missionary couple once a week to help wherever they need us. We'll keep doing this as long as we can over the next year or so to just try our best to repay the generosity we've been given. I'm so glad Jay was receptive when I told him I wanted to do this. Aside from that, I'll try to always help when someone else is in need in any way I can.

Pray for us that Jay finds a good job very soon. This has all become very overwhelming and I sometimes feel like we just can't keep going this way. At what point does the help we have been receiving have to stop because there are others in need, too? That's scary and stressful since Jay's unemployment was denied and we have no income whatsoever. I just keep praying and praying and know we will never be able to do enough to show our gratitude to our church, our friends or the Lord.