What Is Going On?

I wish every time I had a post to make, it was lighthearted and funny, pleasant to read or informative. But certainly these days, that's been hard to catch. Right now, my husband is sleeping because he has to go to work soon and my little girl is happily playing on the computer. I'm shaking from an asthma treatment - just used my nebulizer and it makes me shake all over...inside, I guess, is the best way to describe it. I'm sick with a cold that settled right into my chest. Those are the worst ones for me. And then the phone rang. Can't talk about it to my baby. She needs to find joy in life as often as possible. Can't wake my husband because he needs his sleep. He's sick with a milder cold, too.

My younger sister in Texas just called. My dad is in the emergency room...again...this time for chest pain and shortness of breath. He has a pacemaker from his heart attack years ago in his mid 50's. He hadn't even made it home from the rehab hospital from his last regular hospital stay in connection with yet another serious blood infection. She asked me to call my other three siblings. My oldest brother was a quick call. My other brother, also older than me, was also a quick call because I had to leave a message. My older sister's husband answered, as he always does, but put me right on with her. She's been sick off and on for weeks, having to miss school (she's a teacher as are my other sister and oldest brother). She's been tossing everything from both ends. It goes on for several days until she is terribly dehydrated and then goes away for a week or so. Then it's back. This is her eighth bout with it. Her GP Dr. doesn't know what's going on. She's trying to see a gastro guy but she's in a smaller city and he's hard to get in to. He told her to go the emergency room next time this happens and then he'll be able to see her right away. Otherwise, it will be until late April. In the midst of all this, she had eye surgery a little over 2 months ago, necessary to prevent a sure loss of sight, which showed great improvement 30 days later. Now, 60 days later, she's almost lost her vision and it seems she likely will in that eye. I'm a little worried. She is 57 years old and has had health issues all her life. From the time she was 9 months old, the doctors have told my mother she wouldn't live to be this age or that. As she passed the predicted age, they extended it by 5 to 10 years. Her husband has already lost his vision and a leg below the knee to diabetes. I don't know if her diabetes is related to her vision issue or not. She's part-time in a wheelchair, too.

We just found out we will have a tax return this year that we certainly didn't anticipate. That means my daugther and I can drive to Texas this summer for my nephew's high school graduation and to see my parents. I'm scared. I'm just praying I see my dad then. I feel like I need to say good-bye and even though I wouldn't actually say it, I could in my heart in case I don't see him again after June. At the moment, I feel very, very stressed out. So if you read this post, please just pray for my dad and my sister, because I worry how long she'll be around, too.